Side Effects of Adultery: Slashed Tires, Hot Grits and Death


Adultery Has Consequences

*Announcers Voice*

Feeling lonely in your marriage?

Have things just become boring an predictable?

Is your spouse just not giving it to you the way they used to?

Well talk to your doctor about Adultery.

Adultery has been proven to alleviate many of the pains associated with a boring and predictable marriage. You will be able to find that spark for life again and experience the fun, newness, and excitement you had in your relationships before you were married.

You should only take Adultery a few times a year.

You should consult your doctor before you take Adultery to ensure you are healthy enough to begin the medication.

Tell your doctor right away If you experience any itching, burning or unexplained breakouts while taking Adultery.

Side effects may include: destroying your family, hurting your kids, jail time, loss of career, STD’s, hot grits, slashed tires, keyed cars, bleached wardrobes, burnt homes, potash, bodily harm and death

Adultery may be the answer you are looking for all of your marital woes.

Ask your doctor about Adultery.

*End announcers voice*

Funny huh?

In the aftermath of the tragedy that was Steve McNair it seems many men folk have forgotten how serious adultery/cheating/playing with folks emotions really is. Men, more so then the ladies, put all the blame for what happened on Kazemi – the delusional chick who offed herself and McNair. They seem to believe that the tragedy lies solely on her shoulders.

I’m sorry to disappoint the fellas (and some of the ladies) put Kazemi isn’t even the main person to blame for this horror.

This tragedy comes in two parts and had McNair remembered that one of the consequences to adultery is death, maybe he’d still be alive today.

We seem to forget that this type of crime happens so often it’s given a name – a crime of passion.

Not only is it given a name, but a look at pop culture can easily reveal how common retribution by a spurned lover is. From Fatal Attraction to Jazmine Sullivan, our various forms of entertainment are chalk full of examples of the high price people pay for playing around on their significant others.

To those who don’t get it, and seem to think Steve McNair couldn’t have seem this coming, I will make it as clear for you as I can: Remember Al Green and those hot grits?

Nuff said.

And while Rev. Green may not have died, I’m pretty sure most people who read this blog don’t have to delve too far in their lives or their friends and families lives to find tales of a jilted lover/spouse that exacted their revenge with a bullet, knife or some deadly fisticuffs.

Does it happen in all cases of adultery? No.

Does it happen in the majority of cases of adultery? No.

Does it happen often enough that it is a foreseeable consequence of adultery? Yes.

Just like all drug users don’t die, all adulterers won’t die, but it doesn’t mean that death isn’t a real consequence of drug use and adultery.

Folk need to think about those consequences long and hard before dipping their pens in someone else’s inkwell (or opening their inkwells to other folk’s pens).

Maybe if they did we wouldn’t have to hear about these type of tragedies that impact not just the adulterer and the murderer, but also the families they leave behind.

Can We Stop With the Blue Collar Men Worship

Blue Collar Men Worship

Blue Collar Men Aren’t Saviors

Can we stop with the blue collar man worship please?

Just because a man works with his hands does not mean he’s more enlightened, steadfast, kinder, gentler, will make a better husband, father or that somehow he automatically qualifies as being a “good” man than those who have white collar jobs.

Blue collar men are like any other men: there are good ones, bad ones and those who fall in between.

Any time dating and marriage in the black community comes up there are women (and men) hollering how if black women just would look at these blue collar men then all of our dating woes would be over. That we’re too busy not looking at what’s important in life an don’t know a “good” man when we see one.



I wonder how many of these women making these comments actually date or are married to blue collar men?

Can we stop pretending like the working class lifestyle is the bees knees?

That that is what all of us over educated women should aspire too?

And yes – some – blue collar men make “good money” (as the argument goes) but unions aren’t what they used to be and it’s not all about dollars, but about shared values, interests and life experiences.

No one is knocking blue collar men. Date and marry a blue collar man if you like, but just because some women don’t want to marry blue collar men doesn’t mean they don’t know what a “good man” is. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, it’s not about finding any good man, but about finding the right good man for you.



Is an Open Marriage Ever Okay?

Open Marriage

Open To An Open Marriage?

So not too long ago Monique’s husband was quoted as saying he didn’t mind if his wife got her sex on with another man:

“We’re saying that if by some chance that you hear scandal and you hear that Mo’Nique slept with another man, it won’t be a need for a press conference because I’m going to say, ‘Why are y’all tripping off that? Because that’s what she did. Did she sleep with that man and you?’ That’s not a deal breaker for myself … We are logical enough to understand that things like this do happen.”

Monique has also been quoted as stating that she has an open marriage and she’s okay with that. Now I know Monique isn’t the best example to use of a person having an open marriage. She isn’t known for her stellar choice in men (first husband was a criminal and illiterate) and her decision to have an open marriage reeks of desperation. You know, the fat girl wants love so she will agree to anything so she can have this slim, half-way attractive man.

So the question is, is an open marriage ever okay?

A while back Will Smith made a comment along the lines of him and Jada not breaking up should someone dip out as long as it was something that was talked about first. That simple comment sent the black blogs ablazin’ as folk who don’t know Will and Jada from Adam and Eve were in a tither at the mere idea that the two might have a marital arrangement outside of the norm or what folk would consider acceptable.

I’ve never quite understood why people get all up in arms over what consenting adults decide to do in their relationships. I’m of the opinion that as long as the two parties involved are completely okay with the arrangement then it isn’t any concern of mine. People have the right to set the terms of their relationships without approval from the masses.

So once again I ask: is an open marriage ever okay? Why or why not? And could you see yourself agreeing to such terms in a relationship?

Sorry, but a College Educated Man is a Must When It Comes to Marriage

College Educated Man

A College Educated Man Is A Must

So today Belle, over at a Belle in Brookly had a post about settling when it comes to relationships and marriage:

Would you settle? Have you? Is there a difference between settling and compromise? If so, what is it?

I think about it all the time.

Years ago, I read a quote somewhere that went, “whenever you settle, you always get less than you settled for.”

As the conversation progressed many women (myself included) said the differences between compromising and settling is that you decide what your deal breakers are and then don’t budge on them. Those things that are most important to you aren’t things you can compromise on ’cause then you’re settling.

When I mentioned that a deal breaker for me was lack of a college educated…I was immediately called shallow…and Belle’s comment to me summed up what many of the men and women felt about my deal breaker:

…your qualifications about a degree are shallow. (sorry to be blunt, but I’m typing in a hurry.) I’m not saying go find a man who doesn’t read. I’m saying that degrees don’t have a sense of humor or investigate bumps in the night, or bring you soup when you’re sick or keep the bed warm. It’s a piece of paper not a character trait. If the piece of paper is more important than any of that, God bless you and good night. Oh, and there are a lot of dumb people with degrees who don’t read or watch the news. I don’t say this to get at you in any kind of way. I just [dont] want the younger women reading to think that makes any kind of sense.


‘Cause i expect a man to be college educated?


Here was my response:


Black American women are the only women I know who can say with a straight face that a man NOT being college educated is shallow and shouldn’t be a deal breaker.

The only ones.

I’m convinced it’s because younger generations of black women have been conditioned to expect less from brothers. It never fails that I get such a venomous reaction when I say I expect a man to be college educated.

“I’m saying that degrees don’t have a sense of humor or investigate bumps in the night, or bring you soup when you’re sick or keep the bed warm.”‘

I never said they did. I just said it was a deal breaker for me.

And no it’s not shallow. I value education for education’s sake. Not out of some sense of money and success, even though there is a high correlation between the two…anyone can Google the studies and see for yourself.

All men who go to college aren’t intelligent – no joke – but I don’t date them.

I date brilliant, highly intelligent and/or talented, ambitious men, I haven’t met one yet who didn’t have at least a bachelors.

There isn’t a single man in my group of friends and extended peer group who doesn’t have At Least a bachelors and most have advanced and/or professional degrees. Not One. And my circle of people are 99% black.

Take a poll of the fortune 500 or 100 all of our Presidents and most anyone with a professional career of any sort (hell many policemen and firemen too) and then come back and tell me how being college educated isn’t important and is merely a shallow requirement.

If all you want is someone who has a “sense of humor or investigate bumps in the night, or bring[s] you soup when you’re sick or keep the bed warm.”

Then by all means don’t consider his level of education.

But i require much more than that in a serious relationship…and a man who poo poo’s at furthering his education isn’t going to give it to me.


And note to the young women on the board, my advice remains the same: Know what are deal breakers for YOU and then make your choices in men. Don’t decide on what’s a deal breaker based on what other people think…’cause then you’d be settling.

And I stand by what I said. For me, being college educated is about shared values. I will be John Brown if I marry a man and he says to our children, “Oh daddy didn’t go to college and I’m successful so you don’t above to go either.”

That would make me slap him and any child who thought that was a good idea.

It’s funny to me ’cause most of the women I hear saying a college education doesn’t matter are college educated themselves. Often this “he doesn’t have to have a degree” mind set seems to be perpetuated by women who feel like they should, “give a brother a chance,” and understand how hard it is for a black man to make it or feel like they’re shutting off the number of available of black men they have to choose from for marriage if they insist he has a college degree.

That kind of thinking comes from a place of fear and sets you up to actually settle and be unhappy in whatever marriage you have. I don’t know about anybody else, but I’m not looking for any good man, but the right good man for me and nine times out of ten that’s going to require a college education.

Why I *Heart* Gold Diggers

Gold Diggers

I Love Gold Digger And You Should Too

I don’t have an issue with gold diggers.

You will never find me complaining about how a woman is a gold digger and shame on her and how she doesn’t deserve to be with that man and he’s such a victim for falling for her game.

Naw, you will never hear me say that.

And there are several reasons why:

1. (Some) Black men call all women gold diggers these days

Nowadays if you expect a brother to pay for a date…you’re a gold digger. It really is that bad. I once had a guy say he thought I was a gold digger because when he was telling me about his book and how he needed an editor, instead of offering my services (I write/edit for a living) for free since I knew he was a student, I had the gall to suggest I be paid for my work.  Yeah…that’s really what he said. Under these conditions, any woman who doesn’t insist on going Dutch never considers a man’s income when evaluating him or marriage and has no expectation whatsoever of being compensated for work she’s done (i.e. the editing) is a gold digger. It’s a no-win situation.

2. Income and financial stability matter when it’s time to marry

I have a friend who is a pharmacy manager. He once said to me that he’d be just as

I have a friend who is a pharmacy manager. He once said to me that he’d be just as marriage-worthy if he were making $20,000 then at the six-figure income he was making now. I laughed. He may still be a nice guy at $20,000 a year, but he is definitely NOT marriage worthy.  When it’s time to marry money matters. If a man can’t provide or a family on his income alone, then he’s not ready to be married. Women still do more housework and rearing of the children than men. MUCH more. So much it’s like women have two full-time jobs, the one they do at work and the one they do at home. If you marry a man who has a comfortable income then a lot of the pressure is off of you to either:

  • a. Have a high-powered career.
  • b. Be a superhuman  homemaker because you can afford the help.

3. There is a difference between a gold digger and  being a savvy woman

A gold digger is a woman who marries a man solely for the money he has. She has no other considerations other than the size of his portfolio. Think Ana Nicole Smith who married an 80-year-old billionaire when she was still in her twenties. There was no other reason for her to marry that man other than the fact he was a billionaire.  That’s gold digging. Now a woman who takes a man’s finances into consideration when considering marriage but also considers his ability as a father, his ambition, his faith, whether or not he’s a nice guy, etc. is NOT a gold digger. She’s taking a comprehensive look at the person she is going to stand up with in front of God and country and say “I do.” That’s “smart not gold digging.

In closing, I will also say that even in scenario #3 I don’t feel bad for the guy involved. A woman who marries a man solely for his money will earn every penny of it. The man isn’t stupid. I know everyone likes to portray men as the victim in these situations. That the poor millionaire/billionaire couldn’t see that this woman only wanted him for his duckets. This man who made millions or billions couldn’t see through this woman’s charade.

Yeah Okay.

What people don’t talk about is that the men in these scenarios get exactly what they want too. Ana Nicole Smith’s old ass billionaire wanted a pretty young thang on his arm. If he could still get it up he wanted the shot at tapping her young sweet ass and you know what, he had every right too. If that’s how he wanted to spend his be it. But he was far from a victim. And most men aren’t. Remember that gold diggers have to sleep with these men…think Hugh Hefner and his girlfriends…*shudders*

So in the end, everyone get’s what they want. No harm no foul. If, however, that’s not what a man wants, he doesn’t have to go that route. Perhaps if many men stop concerning themselves with “dimes” then maybe they would stop bitching about gold diggers as well. Find more substantive ways to choose women, you will get better results.

Interracial Dating: Racial Stereotypes Hurting Black Women

Racial Sterotypes In Dating

Racial Stereotypes Hurting Black Women When Dating

While attitudes have softened toward interracial dating and most people don’t view them as abhorrent any longer, there are still plenty of racial stereotypes in place when it comes to the mixing of the races – black and white in particular:

By analyzing Yahoo personals, researchers found that white men prefer Asian and Latino women to African American women as dating partners, and white women favor African American and Latino men over Asian men.

Asians, African Americans and Latinos were more likely to include white people as possible dates than white people were to include them – suggesting that white people, as the dominant racial group in the U.S., hold the power when it comes to interracial dating.

“Stereotypical images of masculinity and femininity shape dating choices and continue to be perpetuated in the mass media,” said Feliciano, UCI assistant professor of sociology and Chicano/Latino studies. “The hyper-feminine image of Asian American women contrasts greatly with the image of Asian men, who are often portrayed as asexual.”

In comparison, the image of the strong African American woman is at odds with idealized notions of submissive and frail women. This may explain why African American women faced high levels of rejection among men, researchers said.

“Cultural portrayals of African American women in the media continue to stress traits seen as negative, such as bossiness,” Feliciano said.

I’m not surprised by any of the findings of the study. In my online dating experience I’ve found that when I don’t place my race on an ad (say Craigslist) I get a lot of hits, but the moment they find out I’m black they don’t e-mail me back. Even on eHarmony the only serious inquiry I received from a white guy was one who lived in Atlanta and dated more black women than white.

Other experiences of black women I’ve known who’ve done the online dating thing have had the same issues. While attitudes overall may have changed, it is something of a “that’s good for other folks, but not for me,” type of attitude. And with a lot of younger men their families tend to be vehemently opposed to such a union that they succumb to familial pressure regardless of how they may feel for the woman.

Now with that said, I still strongly believe black women have to date the men that are available to them and for many sisters that will mean non-black men of color and white men. BUT…I think the women who will be most successful in interracial/cultural pairings will be those who are culturally aware, are probably more mainstream in their appearance and yes…in shape.

It’s not hopeless by any means, but black women need to be aware and ready for all the issues that come with dating interracially so we can find the love, happiness, and relationships that we all deserve.


Battered Women: Domestic Violence and African American Women

Domestic Violence

Domestic Violence and African American Women

Domestic violence against women has gotten more attention since the Chris Brown and Rihanna debacle, however it is still an issue that doesn’t get the attention it deserves particularly in the African American community:

According to a study conducted by the U.S. Department of Justice in 2000, African American women experience domestic violence at a rate 35 percent higher than white women and 22 percent higher than women of other races. African Americans are more likely to suffer more lethal forms of violence, including being more likely to be killed by an intimate partner, compared to other populations. Domestic violence is a serious problem in the African American community that warrants grave attention.

Also as the economy worsens domestic violence against women is more likely to increase and anecdotal evidence suggests it is on the rise:

As our economy has gotten worse over the past few months, many women’s shelters have seen an increase in the number of women and their children trying to escape an abusive situation. Does this indicate that economics plays a role here? Are middle-class and upper-middle-class men less likely to abuse their partner and families?

Economics definitely play a role with regard to domestic violence. We have already seen the number of domestic violence incidents increase in the past year since our current economic downfall began reaching greater proportions of the U.S. population. We also recognize that domestic violence takes place across all socioeconomic groups.

Until we address much of the misogyny that is dominant in certain aspects of the African American community as well as finding a way to give poor women a sense of agency, black women will still be at risk of being battered and killed by their partners much more than other groups of women.

Hat Tip The Bay State Banner

Relationship Advice: Smart Women Marry for Money

Marry for Money

Smart Women Marry For Money

Black women and marriage are consistently a hot topic online and off. However much of the topic tends to be on the low marriage rates among black women and not on the reasons and they type of men black women should marry. While there are many reasons women should marry, when it comes to black women, marriage and the factors that go into such a decision, money is definitely one the many factors for marriage that need to be discussed.

Money and sex happen to be the number 1 and number 2 reasons for divorce in this country, yet they are also the two things folk like to pretend aren’t that important in a relationship. I’ve already made it clear that I think sex is a relationship deal breaker and to that I will add that a woman who doesn’t evaluate her future spouses earning potential is a plum fool. And no, this isn’t about marrying solely for money…any woman who does so will earn every penny of it…but it is about recognize that your choice in souse will be one of the most important financial decision you make.

Tiger and Elin Woods

We’ve all been weaned on fairytales and Hollywood fantasies where love conquers all, but last time checked the chick in the fairytale was marrying a prince and rarely does a Holllywood movie leave people broke and happy. And before anyone decides to tell me how their parents and grandparents were married for twenty-five years and were happy as a lark, I will say that may be true (doubtful but true), but I promise you they didn’t want to struggle. They may have made the best with the hand that was dealt them, but I guarantee that no one wants to struggle. No one says, “Hey can I have a helping of struggle with a side of stress and despair please,” as they are starting off in life.

A man’s earning potential is one of many factors that has to be evaluated before marriage can be considered. Like it or not this is still a patriarchal society we live in. Women still get paid less for similar work, can still hit the glass ceiling in corporate America and often have to choose between being a mommy and having a high powered career. We still ask the question can women have it all and as long as we’re asking the question the answer is a resounding NO…at least not at the same time. There’s a reason why medical schools and law schools are rough;y 50% female, yet when you look at hospitals and law firms across the country they aren’t reflective of that fact. Many high earning women marry high earning men and once the children show up their careers take a backseat.  Even many of those who continue to work do so on a part-time basis.

And even if you want to continue your career then you’re going to have to have  appropriate child care and that costs quite a bit of money as well. Either way you turn the need to make a smart financial choice in a spouse (for those who want marriage) is absolutely necessary.  This idea that he’s a “good man” but he’s barely making above minimum wage is a joke. He may be a good man, but he is not ready to be a husband. Basic test: if a man is not in a position to provide the basics for a family – food, clothing and shelter – then he is not ready to be married. Date him, enjoy his company, but think long and hard  before you say “I Do.” Contrary to popular belief love does not conquer all,  however it does grease the divorce proceedings quite nicely.

Why Marriage is a Bad Deal for Women

Marraige Bad Deal for Women

Marriage A Bad Deal For Women

I fundamentally believe marriage is a bad deal for women.

Ultimately when it comes to Holy Matrimony women get the short end of the stick and if the divorce rates are any indication (75% of divorces are initiated by women) then I’m not alone in thinking this. The main reason why divorce is horrible for women is that the institution hasn’t changed much from the times when women were viewed as property of first their fathers and then their husbands.

Nowadays (many) men still have the expectation that their wives will still be June Cleaver (Homemakers for those who don’t get the Leave It to Beaver reference) and they will be providers and protectors. However, women are also taking on those roles as well, but still expected to do their “wifely” duties. Basically with the aid of the Women’s Movement, women took on more responsibility and didn’t get much in return.

At least under the old system it was understood that women took care of home and men made the money to care for the family. Not always the ideal situation for women, but at least a more equitable distribution of labor and responsibility. Now many men balk at the idea of a stay at home wife and have every expectation that their wives contribute to the bills and still manage to throw down in the kitchen, take care of the kids (and him) and still do gymnastics in the bedroom.


Really, Really?

Too many men I meet expect their women to be like their over worked mommas and grandmamas who’s only thought was taking care of home and her dependents (including her husband). Well, I’m sorry to disappoint, but I’m no mule. If a man wants a maid (or his momma) then he needs to hire won or better yet, marry her. I refuse to be run ragged made to beleive that a real woman can juggle home, marriage, career and kids and do it all with a smile and in three inch heels. That’s a fantasy, a bill of goods, a lie that “modern” women have been fed over the years and somehow have swallowed as truth. And if more women were honest with themselves they’d know it was a lie too.

The other deal with me and marriage is that too many women I know seem to lose their identity once they say “I do.” They become wives and mothers but self seems to get lost along the way. Also many women become shells of their former vibrant, intelligent selves. Not always, but often. I know several happy marriages and those couples tend to fall into one of two categories, which also happens to be the only times I believe marriage is worthwhile for a woman:

1. The man makes enough money to care for the family only on his income. Whether the wife is working or not she knows that she and the kids will be well taken care of. If she is working then her income goes to savings, help pay down debt, vacations, etc. The point is it won’t take two incomes to live comfortably and their will be sufficient funds to outsource housework (i.e. get a maid) if need be, freeing up time to be with each other and the kids.

2. A true egalitarian relationship. I know some marriages that are true partnerships. They are equally involved in making their lives together work. There is no “His” and “Her” work, the husbands do as much housework and child rearing as their wives. They work out the bills in a way that works well for them and because no one spouse is being overworked they still have plenty of time for each other.

I know many folk who balk at one and while many people hope for two that is rarely how it works out. I’ve seen enough marriages through friends and family across socio-economic lines to know that many “typical’ marriages mean a lot of work for women with too few benefits. And please don’t talk to me about love and companionship because those can happen without a ring and too often seem to last longer when you don’t say “I do.”

I think too often, we as women idealize marriage and make it about what we hope it to be instead of what it really is. I think many women should probably take a hard look at the institution before they dive in and make sure that what they want and are expecting to get out of marriage is really what they are going to get. Like I said, 75% of divorces are initiated by women, so there is something about marriage that’s not working for the fairer sex, a fact no one really talks about when we focus so much on getting that ring.



Stop Defending Domestic Violence

Domestic Violence

Defending Domestic Violence

So, what I’ve been able to gather from the Chris Brown/Rihanna situation is that if a woman “escalates conflict” with a man then it is perfectly within the man’s right to beat the shit out of her. No questions asked. And I’m not speaking in hyperbole here. The recent results from a survey done of Boston area teens regarding the Chrianna situation suggest just that many believe domestic violence is okay:

Corcoran’s program, housed in the Commission’s Division of Violence Prevention, surveyed 200 Boston youth ages 12 to 19, between Feb. 13 and 20, using the Chris Brown-Rihanna case to gauge their attitudes toward teen dating violence; 100 percent of those surveyed had heard about the incident. Among the findings:

* 71% said arguing was a normal part of a relationship
* 44% said fighting was a normal part of a relationship
* 51% said Chris Brown was responsible for the incident
* 46% said Rihanna was responsible for the incident
* 52% said both individuals were to blame for the incident, despite knowing at the time that Rihanna had been beaten badly enough to require hospital treatment
* 35% said the media were treating Rihanna unfairly
* 52% said the media were treating Chris Brown unfairly

In addition, a significant number of males and females in the survey said Rihanna was destroying Chris Brown’s career, and females were no less likely than males to come to Rihanna’s defense.

On one hand saying Rihanna is equally to blame for her face being bashed in is taking the personal responsibility meme to its natural conclusion: whatever happens to you is ultimately your responsibility, regardless of what it is. Not only that but many men (and women) feel it’s their right to beat the hell out of a woman at the slightest provocation. One of my favorite comments so far:

….the problem is that we are not teaching our daughters to be accountable for their actions….The same way if someone breaks into your home even if he does not have a weapon, you are going to put a bullet in his ass. If a bitch slap you, treat her like [a man] and bitch [slap] and stump her ass.

So since one of my favorite bloggers take on the situation is that “It takes two people to create conflict and those two people participated equally in the escalation of a conflict,” I ask what’s considered “escalation?” Let’s concede that Rihanna slapped up on Chris Brown. Obviously, many people feel that that was reason enough for her to get beat so badly that she was hospitalized.


But what if she just looked at the text and then questioned him about it? Is that reason enough to get beat? What if she would have yelled and screamed at him? Is that enough to have your face smashed into the dashboard? How about questioning his authority? Is that reason for him to bite you?

The same blogger says, “Violence just don’t happen for the heck of it, something happened that made it reach up to such a point.”


How about the pregnant women who get murdered every year because their boyfriends or husbands didn’t want the kid? I guess the “escalated conflict” by getting knocked up and deciding to have the baby, huh?

Or the women who get smacked around because their significant other perceived they’d been “disrespected,” in some way shape of form and how about those chicks who have the audacity to disagree with their boyfriends or husbands…man they should just get their asses wailed on since they knew disagreeing would, “escalate conflict” and result in the royal beat down.

I’m seriously disturbed when there are so many justifications for beating a woman in generally and beating her so badly that her injuries required hospitalization in particular. When did we get here…again?

Was nothing learned over the past thirty years? Do we really believe that it is a man’s right to beat his woman for the slightest offense? I find all this quite sad and I will never cease to be amazed at how many women so readily agree with men when these type of incidents happen.

Is this the future I have to look forward to for my daughter? Are her future suitors going to believe it’s okay to smack her around if she steps out of line? I hope not, but after reading much of the commentary on the Chris Brown/Rihanna situation I’m not so hopeful.